I found this epic Christian book on memory analysis. They say understanding your earliest memories help make sense of problems in life now. My earliest memory? I was a figure. I made myself into a figure in my own head. It was a Coping mechanism. I even had a pretend coach and announcers talking to the figure. I imagined everyone cheering for me. Hahaha! It didn’t matter what happened exactly or what type of figure I was, I was just this public figure if some kind. And in some ways, a mechanical projection.