Everything has changed

I guess it’s good. Yesterday I learned that Stacey might live in Sausalito. And it drove home some facts. She hasn’t talked to me. She moved away. I remember working at ebs and I had a great rythm down. And it was Ron, Glenn, Terri, me, Stacey, Ezra, Jessica, Elizabeth, all in our little area. And the company was doing really well. We were a pretty good team. Then Paul and Donna left. Then they got rid of me. And the poor place just doesn’t seem like it’s gotten any traction ever since. And everyone else has ripped off their technologies and ideas. And then Stacey left. Probably because of me. Now Ron and Martin are gone I found out. It’s just so sad. We all had an amazing thing going there. We really did. Then I was at Areias. I love Scott’s valley. I would run everyday on the trails. And I took people Sailing. And that was my thing. And I went to church and I was happy and at peace. Now everything has changed. I can’t stand Santa Cruz anymore. And I’m jealous that Stacey probably found herself a nice quiet peaceful nook somewhere. That’s what I’m striving for but my area is just not like that. Not unless I get loud and intimidate everyone. Maybe I should do that. That’s what I have been working towards for so long. A cute cozy little cabin by the harbor. Now it’s like overrun by wackos. I have always just wanted to settle. Church isn’t peaceful for me anymore. Everyone is accusatory and wound up now. What is going on?!

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