It is weird how susceptible I am in to my joy being stolen. Other people have this ability to totally throw me off. As if I haven’t done anything good in the last 34 years. Just all bad. Today. It’s like today is all that matters to them. I am tired of these types of people. Maybe I should move to the foothills where the grass is green and the people are established. I am surrounded by people who aren’t established. Just constantly ping ponging every day. No direction. No structure. No plan. No hope. Just loss. Leave me alone! I just want to love myself and my house. And protect it and dignify it. It’s like it’s all of California. Maybe not. But maybe. Maybe it’s me too!