Time to mature

I now realize why people treat me weird. I need to mature!

I never got to be a full teenager. It was me, my mom, and my sister, scrambling to get by. My mom lead it and she did really well. But I had to do a lot too. So emotionally, I never got to go through that time of freedom like most of my peers. So, I sort o fave in the last five years. And who could ask for more? But it’s time.

I met tons of other people who seemed possibly more compatible than her, but none of them fit like her. There was no replacement. We were perfectly incompatible.

The problem was that my hero is mike Rowe. And I love dirty jobs. All of them. Sewage. Mud. Toilets. That’s what I did as a kid! My dad and I would fix the sewage system. My friends and I would hike down the mud stream. And I would clean the toilets at the gas station. And the greasy floors. My favorite? Buy a junked trashed car, and clean it!!! Yes! I bet I could actually make a ton of money doing something like that…

Time to mature

I now realize why people treat me weird. I need to mature!

I never got to be a full teenager. It was me, my mom, and my sister, scrambling to get by. My mom lead it and she did really well. But I had to do a lot too. So emotionally, I never got to go through that time of freedom like most of my peers. So, I sort o fave in the last five years. And who could ask for more? But it’s time.

I’ve been shifting for my entire life

And along the way you pick up tricks and a feel for it. First you have to relieve pressure on the chain. Then click. And most beginners don’t realize the click is directly linked to the cable, which is pushing on the chain… you can feel the chain through the clicker. Then gradually apply pressure as the chain engages the new gear, all the way back to full throttle. Ohhhhh man. That’s my favorite. And it all happens in a quarter of a second.

I began to realize,

That some of my actions stressed her out. And it wasn’t any feelings she could control. So I would have to adjust to not doing something I didn’t need to that would stress her. Because, because!

Sailing Saturday

Ahh it’s good to be free. Today I figured out how to make my new door fit in its rough opening, I planned a sail, I went sailing, it was fun, I am feeling good and happy. Oh, and a bike ride up to wilder. It’s so weird meeting amateurs. They talk funny and are really combative. And I slowly and gently explain, if they will listen, that I’ve been riding these trails for my entire life! The whole time! And it takes them a while to understand that. They criticize, and they can’t understand how I can shift so well without the newest bike technology. It’s ok. But it’s so weird. Should I just ignore these people? Maybe! Maybe I should be a better judge of who to talk to. Ohhh I cant wait to get back to work.

My favorite

Are morning emails. Definitely. You can wake up, and check, and sometimes they’re their early, and sometimes later, sometimes colorful, sometimes contrasts, but every time, every time, it’s like hiking down to the lagoon and forgetting that there are these little purple flower growing on the side of the trail, and rediscovering them, again, and picking one and getting that little drop of honey, like that day in summer camp year ago. Like that!

Ohhhh noooo

What is wonderful are morning emails! Ohhh they’re so good. It’s like a dawn hike at wilder, when the mist is still dense, and every little flower has a little drop of morning syrup, like honey on a banana pancake.